Truth be told, I’m no stranger to a face mask of the brightening, tightening, pore-perfecting persuasion. Butt (wink) a butt mask that claims to plump, tone and tighten down to your derrière… with collagen, no less? Who doesn’t want glimmering glutes? I figured it was time to get involved. At the risk of making an ass of myself, I decided to document my journey to a better backside.
The cheeky experiment began with a soft scrub down in the shower. A small scoop of That booty tho. and some circular motions later, things were off to a smooth start. Regular use is supposed to target cellulite and help with any stretch marks or discolouration. I was expecting the scrub – made of walnut shells! – to feel a little more coarse as it polished my peach, but the sand-like texture was luxuriously fine. A foreshadowing of my future featuring sandy-cheeked, Sports Illustrated Swimsuit shoots on the beach? Time would tell.
With a prepped, exfoliated booty ready to soak up the mask, it was time to get Down with the thickness. After applying a thin layer, I carefully plopped onto the couch (bottoms up!) and waited for the mask to work its magic. With detoxifying pink clay and nourishing B5 and B3 vitamins in the mix, I had high hopes for a tighter tush. I passed the time sipping matcha and flipping through the gorgeous pages of High Vibrational Beauty. Self-care game strong, if I do say so myself.
With the process almost complete I headed back into the bathroom to swipe off the cute pink mask with a washcloth. I noticed a difference already, but held out for the grand finale – after 15 minutes of lounging, it was time to wake that ass back up with a caffeinated, watermelon booty oil boost! Have you seen my underwear? boasts a hydrating blend of oils as well as arabica coffee bean oil for it’s firming, cellulite fighting properties. Although the oil likely takes most of the credit, I also chanted “see ya later, cellulite!” to really double down on my results with the power of positive thinking.
A couple test slaps in front of the mirror later (well, how else are you gonna test that tush?!) and I’d say my booty had less of a jiggle, more of a healthy bounce. A celebratory naked dance party confirmed these initial results.
All said and done, I’ll be making butt masking a regular thing whenever my cheeks are making a beachside debut or my peach needs a pick-me-up plump. Do I still need to drop it like a squat? Absolutely. But do I have a more supple, baby-soft and bouncier bottom? No butts about it.