Sometimes, being in the mood for sex can be a huge challenge. There are so many things that can throw you for a loop, make you feel uncomfortable, or just plain tired. If you’re in a relationship and having sex, this can be multiplied as maybe both partners don’t feel like they want to do it. But spicing things up may not be the issue you’re having. There’s more to the physical, mental, and sexual anatomy than meets the eye. We get down to the nitty-gritty and find out what may be failing, and what works. Keep reading for more.
What Can Make You Want to Have More Sex
There may need to be less emphasis on genitals, for starters. Sex, even bad sex, is never good if it’s just focused on skipping foreplay, stimuli, and all that stuff in between! Have a make-out sesh! Rub your partner’s feet on the couch! Do a striptease! Desire is a slow-burning fire that builds. And it’s always better when it’s prolonged. If you’re in a relationship where the desire levels accelerate at different times, this is the way to go. You want to catch up to your partner, and not rush them. Simple acts of touching are best for this.
Sexual energy is a different thing altogether. It is so important to build sexual energy and want. Orgasms are important, yes, but they are just the finale. Think about it this way: when you’re describing a hot sexual encounter with someone, it reads like an erotic novel, not a simple retelling of your final orgasm. Use these acts to slowly build up sexual energy and over time, you will become sexually driven more often.
What to Use For Sex
If you are in the mood to have sex, it’s also important to make it feel as good as possible.
They Call Her Alfie Love Gel ($39)
We love the They Call Her Alfie Love Gel for everything sexual health. They Call Her Alfie’s Love Gel is a lightweight gel that is applied prior to sexual activity to the clitoris to help promote a heightened and more sensitive experience. Their Love Gel has two times more effective permeation of key ingredients and has three times longer retention of active ingredients than any other product on the market. And it comes with a bang for its buck because not only does it get you in a desirable and horny mood, but their Love Gel also hydrates, soothes, and rejuvenates when used on a regular basis. It’s incredible before sex and it’s incredible for the health of the vagina. Shop here.
They Call Her Alfie Glide Lubricant ($15)

During sex, using a hydrating lubricant is key for a good time. Alfie’s Glide Lubricant is a squalane-based lubricating treatment that supplements your natural moisture while enhancing intimacy. For intimate areas, so you can slide, glide, and be comfortable.
Shop here.