Though movies like Bridget Jones’ Diary and Christmas films centre around finding your perfect match just in time for the holiday season, we know real life doesn’t always work out this way. Often singles are cast as sad, lonely people that couples take pity on, especially during the holiday season – while it can be a tough time for some singles out there, it doesn’t have to be all doom and gloom! The holiday season can mean different things to different people, but it’s not uncommon that the festivities can bring on the blues for many of us. We often see advertisements of happy couples and families gathered around the tree, and for some of us it can be triggering if we don’t have those ‘special people’ to share the holidays with. On top of that, the uncertainty that COVID-19 has brought to the holidays, let alone the whole year, can be unsettling and worrying for those in isolated states.
As a single, you don’t need to live up to these holiday expectations of being in a relationship but it’s easy to fall into a trap where you don’t feel like your life is complete without that person to share it with. What most people don’t know is that being single around this time of the year can be wonderful, it all depends on how you decide to spend it! We’ve come up with a few steps to get your head and heart into the holiday spirit.
Here’s How to Survive the Holiday Season When You’re Single
1) Change Your Mindset
Rather than looking for what you’re missing in life, think about all the things you can be grateful for. Whether you want to focus on the great people in your life, be it friends, family, co-workers and even your pets, or you can appreciate how far you’ve come this year in your career, personal life, or mental health, there’s always something to be thankful for. You’ve made it through 2020 and can’t wait to see the back of it, so why not use this time of the year to celebrate getting to the finish line?
2) Stay off social media
The loved-up couples and constant engagement posts are coming, so if you find this kind of content triggering, it might be a wise idea to steer clear of your Instagram feed for a while. Our feeds can be overflowing with couples gift-giving, going on holidays and posing in those God-awful matching pj sets, no one will stop you from checking out of the digital world for a few days to focus on yourself. Besides, it’s good to remember that people only post the very best version of their lives online, so take comfort in the fact that while they post away, you might be more content with your life than they are.
3) Be thankful (you’re not in the wrong relationship)
One thing’s for certain, there are a lot of singles who will grab the first person they rub up against and make them their beau around this time of the year, just for the sake of having a boyfriend or girlfriend. What can be detrimental to your mental health is purely being with someone because of status – you don’t want to be in the wrong relationship during this time of the year (or ever). There are plenty of couples who stay together throughout the holidays because of convenience, when they’re actually unhappy; you can be thankful that while you are single, the relationship you have with yourself is far healthier than some couples around you.
Since you don’t have to think about getting your non-existent partner anything for Christmas, why not use that money to spend on yourself this year? It’s been a hard time for most of us in 2020, so there’s really no better time to splurge and get yourself that Air Fryer you’ve been eyeing off since March! Indulging in yourself doesn’t just mean gifts, it can also be an opportunity to take time out for yourself – turn off the notifications and do something for yourself you never get to do!
You could go camping with friends, take a much-needed spa day, enjoy a movie with no interruptions, or do something as simple as having a bath and reading a good book. The world is your oyster and the holidays is your time to put yourself first!
5) Spend time with friends
If you can, bring your favorite people together and get the Kris Kringle spirit going (even if it’s via FaceTime)! There’s nothing like having an excuse to catch up with friends over food and drinks while opening silly and sentimental presents. It’s a great way to take your mind off the never ending single-dom questions that will come with opening gifts with family, and you can choose who you want to spend this silly season with. This holiday season is about letting go and being content with your single style; you should feel like you can own it and not have to answer to anyone about your status.
Dr Lurve is a leading love and relationship expert. Dr Lurve specializes in helping people navigate the science and metaphysics of relationships. A modern-day cupid for individuals discovering self-love, singles ready to find love and couples ready to make love last forever, she is an authority on how to make relationships long-lasting. Follow her on Instagram @dr.lurve.